Santa had treats at our house this year!

Kendalan was not going to stop until I caved and we baked cookies for Santa.   I think the girls also were full of cookie dough before we were done.   Then I forgot to take a photo of the finished product.   We also left a glass of chocolate milk.   I had to drink the milk down soon after the girls went to bed because we have a couple of cats that would have their noses in it if I didn't.

Yummy, cookies for breakfast.  Isn't that what the champions eat?

Happy Birthday RaeAnne

Our baby turned 15 years old today!  I can not believe how time has flown by.   It seems just the other day that she was toddling around the house.   Usually the birthday person gets to choose where they eat on their birthday, but Mom was feeling a little under the weather.   Daddy took RaeAnne, Tessa and Kendalan to Subway.

She will be getting her birthday present along with her Christmas gift this year.  We have usually made sure that she had a separate birthday present, but this year I think she will be very happy with what she gets!

Happy Birthday RaeAnne!  We love you to the moon and back!!

End of the year approaches.

So hard to believe that 2014 is almost a thing of the past.   It has been a busy year and a much better year than 2013.   2013 found me with Triple Negative Breast Cancer.  A very fast Lumpectomy and then I started right into chemotherapy.  After the chemo was done I started radiation which I did not understand was going to be an accelerated process.  Each time I went in they would give me the same amount I had before and then tack on some more.  It was kind of like getting a sunburn on the inside of your body and it worked it's way to the outside.  Right now, today, my left breast (the one that had cancer) is a cup size smaller than the other one, or as Mark says "The twins aren't identical anymore!"

My swimsuit days are past.  I will be happy to sit on the side of the pool and keep my feet wet.   The girls had a wonderful summer swimming in Overbrook.  Jordis once again swam for the Overbrook swim team and she improved her numbers from last year!   Tessa and Kendalan are possibly going to join the team next year.  It makes sense for them too as we have to go for one child, can be three instead and the exercise that they get will be fantastic for them!

I started working PRN June 2nd at Stormont Vail Periop Services.  I love the people I work with and it is very interesting to learn about surgeries that I have never taken care of.   I oriented for a couple of weeks and then they decided that I was going to do okay.   For the next 6 weeks I didn't get any phone calls!   Finally while we were in Kentucky they called and asked me to work.   Then the shifts started coming fast and furious.   It was great to start getting a paycheck again!   Then out of the blue one lady who was working part time evenings found another job and turned in her resignation.  I was the first person they called to ask if I was interested.   Was I ever!!  So now I work 3-11pm three nights one week and two nights the next week alternating back and forth.  This event also put us in the position to go back on health insurance through the hospital again!  Boy did we need that!!

I am still suffering from neuropathy in my feet and hands.  I am seeing the neurologists APRN who has been fantastic about trying new meds to help.  It seems like the new meds have made a small difference, but not out of the woods yet.

RaeAnne has been having a fairly good year as a freshman.   She has a public speaking class that has been really hard on her.   She practiced her speech on me tonight and I think she does a great job.  She does need to slow down, pronounce her words more clearly and just chill more!   She is so shy, I hope that these kind of classes will help.  She chose to stay home from the Winter Formal Dance last weekend as she did not want to buy a dress to wear.   My toyboy will eventually have to dress up and I am sure she will be a gorgeous girl!  This was the 8th grade graduation dress I forced her to wear!

ZoraLin was busy the first part of school playing volley ball.  Her 7th grade team was new, but they were learning and getting better by the end of the season.  I hope she plays in 8th grade as I saw a real change in her.   She was eating better, taking more time to get her homework done correctly and she really toned up.  Since she is not in band I think that this is a good extracurricular thing for her to do.

Tessa and Kendalan were pretty lazy this summer.   Other than going swimming just about every day, they would spend their evenings watching TV or playing on their electronic devices.  Everyone was assigned chores to do weekly and I changed the chore chart around each week so they wouldn't get bored with the same thing each time.  I also assigned them 20 minutes of reading daily.  I think they
were a little lax on the reading.   But at least we worked on it!   I will make a new chore chart soon
and change things up a little.

The big exciting thing in Kansas this summer was that the K.C. Royals were in the playoffs.  And they took it right down to the wire.  Losing in the last game.   We were rooting for them.  We decided to take a photo that we hoped would be for the celebrating team.  Oh well, it was something to get excited about.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from our house to yours!!

Happy Birthday to Mom!

I am the Queen Kitty for my birthday!!

I knew it had to come around eventually.    I am glad it did!   Getting a year old doesn't seem so bad after the year I went through...last year.    I am still having effects of the chemo and radiation.   I saw my oncologist a couple of weeks ago and asked him about some of the things that are still hanging around.   The overall feeling of being simply exhausted some days.   He said that lingers on for a couple of years.   Well I guess it is good that I have some days of so much energy that I get things accomplished.  Of course, after knocking myself out one day it takes me two or three to get my wind back.   Kind of the same way with work.  I can work for my shift but when I get a day or two off, I spend a lot of time in bed sleeping.

The biggest thing that bothers me is the neuropathy in my feet.   They absolutely throb some days to the point that I am ready to chop them off.   I really feel that it would hurt less to take an ax and chop my feet off at the ankles.   I have tried so many things for them.   The doctor has me on Neurontin and Cymbalta for them.   The thing that works the best is hydrocodone.   They have had me try to massage Emla cream on them to make them numb.   It helps the skin but the throbbing is inside.  I truly never knew that chemotherapy would cause neuropathy.   The doctor said that because I had one of the worst kinds of cancer, triple negative, that he wanted to really hit it hard so it would not come back.   We were blessed to have caught it at stage one.   Neuropathy...something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

The other thing was/is the radiation.   I was given it at increased levels over a shorter amount of time. The results...my skin was burned.   Now almost a year after I finished with radiation.  My breast is a smaller size than the other one.   I know that the lumpectomy took a very small piece of the breast, but radiation has taken quite a bit more.  Plus it has a tan where it was radiated.   I haven't asked how long it will stay dark.  They actually look like I have the boobs of two different women.  It is a good thing that I am not a fan of swimsuits.   I really don't think that I will get in one again.

But with all that, I am thankful for my birthday this year.   It was a very low key day.   I actually spent the whole day in my jammies!   Once the girls came home from school we ordered pizza.   My wonderful cousin in California sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers with a Happy Birthday balloon!   And I had to attend a class at school about benefits and I won a jar full of Jolly Ranchers because my birthday was the next day!   Can't wait until next year!!

Had a few photos taken this last weekend.

When we first bought the M&M's T's we did not know that Mars was moving to Topeka.   I just happened to run across the shirts in Wally World and thought...we have five girls, there are five colors...jackpot!   So the photos were taken before we found out.  

Then Mars moved to Topeka and they had a M&M's store in downtown Topeka for a month.   That store was hopping busy!   We decided to recreate the photo now that the girls are older.   And since we did not remember if they all still had their shirts, we bought them new ones.   They have grown a bit since the last photos were taken.

We also decided to commemorate the Royals going to the World Series.   Hope they win!  The girls were real excited to have Royals shirts.

Of course, Kendalan had to be goofy.   Sparkle Farkle I call her!

Go Royals!!

Pumpkins, dates and hair

Zora, Jordis, Tessa, Kendalan and I went to the pumpkin patch last Sunday.   The weather could not have been more beautiful.   Of course, the better the weather, the more people out and about.  It was a zoo!   We took a few of the requisite photos and then we watched them doing the pumpkin sling shot. Of course the girls thought that looked like fun, but I said it didn't look like $1.00/2 pumpkins worth of fun.  "Oh Mom!"  I held firm.  The pumpkin patch was a muddy mess and I suggested that we go back another day when it might not be so busy and muddy.

RaeAnne did not make it with us to the patch.  Why?  Well, she was on a "date."   Her friend, who happens to be a boy, asked her to go to the K.C. Renaissance Festival.   Dad and I took Rae over to meet his Grandparents and one of his aunts who was taking them.   So he had two aunts with them as chaperones and the word of the Grandparents that they were all good kids.  Well we know that RaeAnne has been "friends" with this guy since last year and so even though it was a date we were cool with it.   She came home a very happy camper and was very excited about her day, so we were happy for her.   I really did say they could not date until they were 30...I am not sure how this happened.

So we had a little fun at the Pumpkin patch and this week Mom got her hair trimmed.   I had to take a selfie of myself.  I watch the girls do this all the time you would think I could do it in one take...nope! But I did get one good shot out of 10.

It's Fall ya'll...

I was looking through the odds and ends of photos I have taken recently.   Then I looked at the calendar and realized it is already October.  OCTOBER!   Where has this year gone?!   That means that Christmas is just around the corner.  

The littles were outside playing recently.   It was so much fun to watch them do kid things.  Jumping rope.  Blowing bubbles.   They grow up so fast.   Blowing bubbles out here in the country you sometimes have to find the right side of the house so the bubbles don't hit you in the face!

One night I came home from work to find a young boy in the house.  David or Dave as he called himself thought he was real swagger.   I don't know where this child comes up with these ideas?  But she is pretty stinking cute whether she is a he or she is a nerd!

ZoraLin finished volleyball last night.  Sadly her team did not have a winning year, but she has gotten better each game she played.   She is ready to play the next time the opportunity arises and I really think that she will go out again next year.   We are really proud of how well she has done and the bonuses of getting good grades while she has been playing.   Go Chargers!

Jordis turned 12 years old on September 14th.   She has come so far from the shy little girl she was. Happy Birthday Jordis Li Meng!  Now figure out what you want already!  She also brought home a bunch of ribbons and medals from swim team this year.  Can't wait for next year as we will have Kendalan and Tessa join the Overbrook Swim Team!!

We have been busy working in the yard.   I FINALLY have my garden beds out and ready to fill with soil for planting next spring.   Better now then never...I have had these for a couple of years now.

And I can't forget what happens on the playground sometimes does not stay on the playground. Recess is for fun, but define FUN?   Tessa found out what happens when you join hands with the other kids and then run around a pole.   When you are on the outside of the group and let go....you go flying and eventually fall down :(    She has a "buckle" fracture and will be in this lovely cast for three weeks.  Then it is x-rayed and we will know if she gets another cast or is given a reprieve.

I love these girls so much.   Even broken bones are a joy more so that it was not a compound fracture! She has done so well with a cast each time.   The only thing she hates is that Mom has to help her take a bath so she doesn't get her cast wet.   And she still has a smile on her face!!

Broken hearted...

We have checked with several different agency's to see if there was any possibility for us to adopt from China again.   Madison said our best bet would be to wait for several years and then try.  CHI said that they would not try now, basically wait for a while.   BAAS said that after I have been cancer free for THREE years they would check into it.  I will be 2 years cancer free April 19, 2015.  Then we contacted Lifeline.  I had heard that Lifeline had been successful in helping families who have dissolved an adoption here in the USA adopt from China again.   Well, it is not going to happen for us now.   The C3WA told them that right now is not a good time.   But they did not give us a time limit.  Now is not a good time...so in 6 months?  A year?  Two years?   Lifeline is going to ask that question for us and they are also going to tell the C3WA that the child we dissolved has been legally adopted here in the USA by a family who love her very much!

The Lifeline person agrees with me.   If you disrupt your adoption in China and leave the child there you CAN go back and adopt again.  That is SO DUMB!!   Okay...I felt that God had put me in her life for a reason and that reason was NOT to leave her in China!   I knew that I had been given the task to bring her home and if we could not be the family that could help her, we would find the best family we could for her.  And we DID.   They have her enrolled in many things that their state pays for because of her mental disabilities.   She has a para at school to help her.   She has a family who has been down this road with another family member.   They know EXACTLY what they are doing and they love her very much!   They have legally adopted her...I could not see leaving her in China!   She would have never received the care and training that she needs there.  She probably would have been shuffled off to who knows where when she was older.   Most orphans are moved out of the orphanage when they are anywhere from 16 to 21 years old.   Hopefully by that time they have learned a trade but I don't think there would be anything for a person with mental disabilities to do?! God forbid that they would teach her massage and put her on the street to be a hooker!

For instance, this girl will turn 14 in November.   After you reach the age of 14 in China you are no longer adoptable.   Hopefully this girl will be able to work at the orphanage.

She is at the same orphanage that the little girl we had Preapproval for in January 2013.   She is still waiting for a family too. :(   They are basically healthy children!!   I wish we could bring them home!!

I had been looking at waiting child lists and dreaming of bringing home one more.   There were many kids that would fit in our home.   But now I will have to put my dreams on the back burner.  Unless we find another country that we could adopt from. :)   Of course, we do not have the money to adopt at this time either.   I am still picking up only a few PRN hours here and there.   I hope that things pick up soon.   My immediate boss is taking over another department the first of October so maybe she will have more hours for the part time people and then I can pick up part time on the floor!!  Lord this would be something great!!

So this has been my "I am down in the dumps" post.  However I will leave you with news of ZoraLin's first volley ball game.   It was a home game against Wellsville.   Well Wellsville girls have had more practice then our girls have.   But our Chargers gave it their all and I was really proud of Zora and her time on the court.   Her teachers said that she had been pretty nervous all day.  Quite a few of the new players were nervous about their first game.   Now that the first game is over I hope the nerves get better for them.   We have a great bunch of girls playing and if they continue into high school we could have a great team!!   Go SFT!!

This has been such a tough time for me.   Yes, I know that I have five beautiful girls, but I can't get these other kids out of my mind!   There is NO life for them in China.   My dream was to have 6 daughters from China.   And I know we have enough love for at least one more!   Where is that cotton picking money tree when we need it?!  Kendalan asked me the other day what would we do if we won the lottery?   She started naming off things that she wanted us to do.  Like a bedroom for everyone, including the cats and dog!   More vacations!  Traveling more!  She is girl after my own heart!!   I told her it is nice to dream, but don't count on that lottery coming our way.   But wouldn't it be fun?!!   And so is she!   She is practicing dressing up like a nerd for Halloween.  She makes a pretty cute Nerd if I do say so myself!!